Want your kids to become perfect little angels who never argue and do everything you tell them to do this school season? Yes? Then don’t have children.
But. The contract below will get you closer to that lack of reality.
School is starting and we will begin the mad dash of getting the paperwork filled out, school supplies and clothes purchased, wrangling the kids back into a decent bedtime and MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL, the Back to School Contract.
Hear angels singing? You won’t. It isn’t that great, but it’s REALLY REALLY good.
If you don’t have a BTS Contract or as I like to refer to it, a Zip It Contract, you are in for a treat. The sole purpose of the contract is to say ZIP IT to your sanity sucking kids when they start to get feisty.
For example, they might say, “I can’t believe we have to go to bed, it’s only 8:00.”
You will point to the contract hanging on your family board, take a slow sip of my wine, turn to your child and with a June Cleaver smile say, “Remember sweetie, you signed the contract.” In other words? “Zip it.”
If you DIDN’T have the contract, the conversation would have gone like this, “I can’t believe we have to go to bed, it’s only 8:00.”
You would begin with, “It is a school night and you need to get sleep to be smart and grow.”
They would say, “But why? All my friends stay up until 8:30 and they are ALL smart and tall?”
Then something so awful, so disgustingly June Cleaver, would come flying out of your mouth, “IF ALL YOUR FRIENDS JUMPED OFF A BRIDGE”…you get the point. *shivers*
Thirty minutes later you would still be arguing and the whole thing would end with an eye roll, some comment about how unfair you are and your kid stomping off mumbling under their breath.
Instead? Zip it.
Below is a copy of our Back to School Contract:
Homework:
When they get home from school they may have a snack and spend 30 minutes playing. (They deserve it.) Then it is down and dirty homework time.
Chores:
Have chores for your kids. From kindergarten on. They can put their dishes in the dishwasher. They can be responsible for feeding a pet. It can be something as simple as putting all of their toys away. Whatever it is, give them a family responsibility.
Television:
Television during the school week will be after dinner, after all homework has been checked, all chores completed, all showers taken and teeth brushed. No television before dinner. Any extra time before dinner is to be spent outside practicing sports or playing.
Video Games: (This probably only applies to boys.)
No video games during the week. PERIOD. On the weekends, you may play one hour per day after homework that is due on Monday is complete and you have completed your daily chores.
Computer:
You may use the computer instead of watching television. See “Television” for rules.
Bedtime:
Bedtime will be at (whatever time you deem fair in your household.)
Rewards.
Provide weekend rewards if the week goes as planned. Ice cream for the young ones and sleepovers for the older ones.
Everyone signs the agreement and while it doesn’t alleviate every argument it gets rid of most disagreements and shortens the others.
About Ooph
Does this really work? It almost sounds too good to be true. Still, I will definitely try this when my kids are in school.
I am ALL OVER this! Love it! I am making up a contract now!
I don’t have kids but this sounds awesome.
Great for everyone living in Fantasy Land! This was definitely designed for 5-6 year olds.
So adopt it for your tween boys. They should still have some kind of ground rules/chores in the after school/before bed time of the day, right?
Why would you let kids watch TV on a school night but not play games? CAT scans show far more brain activity during video-game playing than during passive TV watching. The right games teach skills and help kids learn.
Anyways, I know that’s not the point of this post. A contract should be adjusted for each family.
But still, I had to speak up for games. They’re a positive thing whereas TV’s almost always a negative thing.
VC. Good point. However, I think this contract is made to be tailored around what works for each individual family.
I really think that as long as you execute this contract can be a huge success. No matter what age your children are, if you set boundaries and guidelines and stick with them the rest will fall into place. Mean what you say, say what you mean.
Please do not be so narrow minded to think that girls aren’t interested in video games as well.
I think this is a great idea. Being a future teacher, I understand the importance of setting clear expectations. It teaches your kids to hold themselves accountable. People should have faith in their children and give it a try. I’m sure there may be some up-front whining from the older kids, but it will sink in eventually. Thanks for the great idea!
I won’t need help with the “rules”, but the rewards are a real challenge! My children’s wants are so fluid that I am not sure what will work. It would be way to stressful coming up with a new “effective” reward each week. Help … Please.